and let the truth be told...

To tell or not to tell....  How much longer could we realistically keep this a secret from most of my colleagues and senior management, although the thought of just turning up to work with twins sounded a bit like fun to me.  I became reliant on the "let's just wait until the next scan/update" and realised that soon this will become "let's just wait until we are back with the babies", possibly then extending out to "let's just wait until their first birthday is over".  Realistically though, I knew the time had come.  My manager had known for some time and I gave him the "ok" last week to advise the founders of the College (who happen to be his parents)!  It became known as operation "Arthur & Martha", and it was deployed in a fashion that rivalled any military operation in history, or possibly earlier.

I might add that I was sick at the thought of people knowing.  I had become comfortable with my two worlds; work was work and home was home.  I never allowed these to mix during operation "Arthur & Martha", otherwise I would have gone absolutely, completely bonkers. I realised how much I wanted people to accept our situation as "normal" and how much the people I work with meant to me. 

Ok, so how do I tell them.  My boss told his managers (parents) and they were extremely happy for me with hugs and words of understanding.  That was my first tears, I don't usually cry, well not in front of people or animals.  This wasn't how I wanted to display my emotions, I was losing control, oh blast.  But I could not help it.  I began to tell more people and always started my conversation with "I won't be here for at least four months next year...".  The looks of concern confused me - no-one had thought that it would be due to me having babies (no doubt because I'm past the "child bearing age", just).  They were expecting some dreadful life threatening news like I was about to undergo some radical extensive treatment for a brain tumour or the like.  I quickly changed my leading statement.

Anyhow, everyone has been absolutely wonderful.  And it has been a huge gargantuous massive relief for me.  I can talk about the babies, openly. People now know and ask me questions.  Mission accomplished.  News is spreading.  I'm receiving phone calls from long lost friends, thanks to a very excited sister in law who has been placed on blood pressure tablets and believes this is due to the fact that I would not allow her to tell people sooner.  My nephew on the other hand, is a little put out, and doesn't want girl cousins.

The one person though that I would have loved to have told is my mum.  She passed away last year but I know that she would be so so happy and she has our little baby girl from earlier this year in her arms, who is aptly named after her.

So for all of you who are worried about telling people your news, use your gut feel, you do know when the time is right.  It isn't always the same for everyone; it's when you feel as comfortable as you think you can be, that is, without waiting until your child/children turns 21!