32 weeks, almost

Almost 32 weeks and we are eagerly awaiting the next scan which is due towards the end of next week.  With all of the necessary documentation completed, we are now officially on standby for deployment of evacuation code yellow!  This means that we have done as much as humanly possible to prepare, pack, organise, and then re-pack, re-organise and re-check.  We are so fortunate that our pregnancy is progressing really well and have decided that we would like to be in Delhi for the birth, if possible.  Sounds easy, doesn't it.  We will wait to see the details on the next scan and then decide when we will travel.  DNA testing has been completed,  visas were received within one week of lodging and flights & accommodation booked.  I'm over the wait, just get me there.  Then perhaps it might feel real?

Although I am now thinking more and more of our babies; it still feels strange to think that we will be a family in a matter of a month or so.   I continually go into the nursery, not really looking at anything in particular, but I think just to confirm that it all is happening.  It still doesn't feel real; to think that less than one year ago we set out on this trek and here we are today.  I've had many trekking adventures, of a different type of course  - South America, Borneo, Nepal, Africa.  All have been satisfying, particularly when the end is reached and you're able to reflect on the challenges and obstacles overcome during the ordeal. There were many times during each when you wondered why you would put yourself through it, but at the end there always was a sense of euphoria and accomplishment.  Only if you had gone through it, would you experience this sensation - explanations don't seem to do these feelings justice.  I think that's what it's like with surrogacy and which can only be truly understood by those who are on the same trek as yourself.

On another note, every now & then I have total freak out where I become totally obsessed with finding out something I don't know.  While experimenting with my electronic steam steriliser, following the instructions word for word, I was given a demonstration by a friend of mine, a mother of two.  It soon become apparent to me that sterilisation in the context of clinical or medical sterilisation which is the only sterilisation I know, is NOT the same as sterilising soothers on your kitchen bench.  Anyway, after much frustrated discussion, I gave up.  The soothers do not need to be sterilised according to the national health standards to counteract an outbreak of infectious disease.  I have since learnt that I need to get out more on weekends.

I will be starting to pack our bags this coming weekend, so will def be referring to some blogs to help out.  Nothing like organising and re-organising to pass the time.  I will update details next week of Arthur & Martha when the scans are received.

Just for something cute....

Ok, it's not a baby, but it's pretty damn cute!  Woke up and found him (or her) in our Jacaranda tree in our backyard.... the cats were terrified to say the least...

The Wall

Lo and behold.  Our scan last week revealed that our baby twins are growing fat and happy.  What a relief it was to quell my irrational fears.  The babies are still there, they haven't performed a vanishing act and disappeared into thin air, nor have they been abducted by some kind of infertile alien.  No, there they are, sitting on their bottoms taking it all in. (Mmmmm, let's hope that's not a sign of things to come!).

They are now 29 weeks, or 7 months, or birth minus approx 7 weeks.  I'm as prepared as I can practically be; however, the emotions that ensued I could not prepare for.  Xmas Day was the milestone for me - that was the date that I wanted to reach because Arthur & Martha would be at the 7 month mark and  it then all "becomes real".  Well, from Xmas Day, can I tell you, hellllooooo emotions!  And why?  Because my "wall" is crumbling.  It's crumbling, because it can; my dependency on this barricade that has taken me years to build as a self protection measure is falling apart.  I no longer have to hide behind it when I'm faced with a situation I don't want to be in, but have to be, involving children, ie other people's children.  The wall is crumbling, almost piece by piece, and my emotions are opening up and leaking through.  In other words, I am a bumbling mess.  But I am relieved; relieved at the fact that I will soon no longer need the wall. 

On another note, our visas arrived today which took less than one week to process.  Flights have been arranged, accommodation booked, maternity leave confirmed, nursery established.  Now all we have to do is wait......... I do agree with Suzie though, the time is FLYING and has gone so quickly.  This time last year, our area was hard hit with devastating floods; we had just returned from a trip to the UK and were unable to return to work as we couldn't get out of our street.  To think that so much has happened in the course of a year...to think so much will change in the matter of weeks..... yikes and yippee

Christmas was lovely; we received many lovely gifts from our family for the babies, particularly two beautiful mobiles that have been imported from Asia.  They are a type of paper mache - one with brightly coloured birds, the other with elephants.  They will be treasured forever. 

For those starting out on their journey, I truly hope 2012 will be a wonderful year for you.  It has taken us a lot of years and heartache to get there, but it certainly looks like 2012 will be the wonderful year we have been seeking for so long.